Do you hear what I hear?

As a new blogger, I haven't quite decided if I intend to write theologically, personally, reflectively, or (I'm sure there are many other choices - so pick one and insert here). What follows would fit the PERSONAL category. It is a short piece I did for our church publication a few weeks back (Jan. 24). Since this article was written, I have completed the proposed medical procedures (the last one was today). I am sleeping better. But - so far - there is no noticeable improvement to my hearing.
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I am so thankful for the many people who have written and spoken to me assuring me of their prayers for my hearing. It is humbling to know that so many of you are remembering me in, what has become, a “trying” experience. If you don’t quite know what I’m talking about, let me catch you up.

Eight weeks ago I was riding horses and hiking mountain trails and firing pistols in Montana and came away having lost much of my hearing in both ears. After trips to three medical doctors (two are specialists), three trips to the audiologist, two MRIs, and consultation with the Mayo Clinic, they cannot determine either a clear cause for the problem – or a solution. While I was around some loud noise, my hearing tests are not consistent with noise-induced hearing loss. I am experiencing significant internal noise in my ears which, up until a few days ago, is limiting my sleep to four and a half hours a night.

Last Monday, I had a consultation with the second specialist. When I was exposed to the sound of a tuning fork, I heard one note in my left ear and the same note was almost a full step higher in my right. That particular symptom makes this hearing loss even more unusual. This doctor went on to tell me that the odds of someone experiencing sudden onset, profound hearing loss in both ears where the tested loss in both ears is nearly identical is probably – “one in a billion.”

As of this writing, I have an option to undergo a trial procedure (described as "quite painful") that can “show minimal, but noticeable improvement to some symptoms" in about 20 percent of patients. Even if the procedure is successful, it is likely that I would require hearing aids to improve speech recognition. The specialist’s conclusion is that this hearing loss is “not likely” to improve. And because of the tone distortion, I may have ongoing difficulty enjoying music. And, because of the noise in my ears, my days of hearing true silence may also be behind me.

I do wish I had better news. Yet, in the bigger picture, I have received amazing medical attention. I am already learning to manage the loss. Hearing aids are available that can improve my situation considerably. And God is in control and He knows what He is doing. I haven’t given up by any means. I don’t like not hearing. I am still praying for healing. But I also know that the One who made me and has shown me so much grace in the past, can be trusted now.